ttznovel Chapter 198: A Scared Prince.
Chapter 198: A Scared Prince.
Kaelis visibly stiffened.
It was so obvious in Ezra’s eyes that he almost felt bad watching it happen in real time.
And much more unfortunately for Kaelis—
Lior was also in a very observant mood today.
"Kakay, you’re not comfy anymore," Lior points out innocently, lightly poking Kaelis’ arm. "Like a wall."
That made Kaelis take a sharp breath.
But again, unfortunately for him—
It immediately made him cough.
Hard.
Not even a composed princely cough either.
An actual choking cough.
Which somehow made the whole situation even worse because there wasn’t even anything for him to choke on.
They weren’t drinking.
They weren’t eating.
Kaelis had literally just malfunctioned on air.
"Are you okay, Your Highness?" Ezra asks awkwardly, genuinely unsure whether he should be concerned or amused. "Did you...choke on air?"
"I—cough—please—don’t mind me—I’m..."
Kaelis was babbling.
Actually babbling.
The same prince who usually had an answer for everything.
The same Kaelis who could tease Ezra endlessly without missing a beat.
’I’ve never seen him like this before.’
"I think Kakay is being shy," Lior says very seriously.
This immediately caused Kaelis to cough even harder.
"Lior..." Ezra says carefully, trying very hard not to laugh because somehow that felt cruel right now. "Can you draw Prince Kaelis a picture to make him feel better? I think he’s feeling a bit shy, so a drawing might help calm him."
"Oh~" Lior looks back at Kaelis curiously. "Will it?"
Kaelis had only just stopped coughing.
Now he was fully looking away in embarrassment, half-hidden behind his long hair like he genuinely wanted to disappear from the conversation entirely.
Then he cleared his throat awkwardly.
"Yes, Lior," Kaelis says, somehow managing to sound princely again despite everything. "I would feel...a lot better if you drew me a nice picture with a lot of colors."
Lior’s face brightened immediately.
"I can do that!" he exclaims excitedly as he quickly jumps off Kaelis’ lap. "I’ll be right back!"
Then he immediately runs off to search for wherever Ezra had placed the papers, crayons, and pens earlier.
Ezra watched him for a moment automatically, making sure he wasn’t about to trip over something or accidentally destroy part of the room in his excitement.
But once he saw that Ior was fine—
Ezra slowly turned back toward Kaelis.
Who still refused to look at him.
Still hiding half his face behind his hair.
And somehow—
That sight felt surreal.
’This is the first time I’ve seen him like this.’
And Ezra had already seen many sides of Kaelis before.
Some more...bare than others.
That thought immediately made heat crawl up Ezra’s neck.
’Don’t think about that.’
"Are you alright?" Ezra asks after a moment, now feeling awkward himself with Lior temporarily gone and the room suddenly much quieter. "You seem..."
He pauses.
Honestly, he didn’t even know what word fit Kaelis right now.
Flustered?
Embarrassed?
Nervous?
It felt strange associating any of those things with Kaelis.
"I’m fine," Kaelis answers quickly.
A little too quickly.
And it sounded forced enough that Ezra immediately noticed.
"I apologize for Lior," Ezra says instead, rubbing lightly at his arm. "He doesn’t really understand boundaries yet, and—"
"It’s not that."
Kaelis finally turned toward him fully.
And Ezra blinked slightly.
Because Kaelis looked...stunned.
Embarrassed too.
But there was something else there that Ezra couldn’t fully name.
Something softer.
More vulnerable than Kaelis usually allowed himself to look.
It was such an unfamiliar expression on his face that Ezra genuinely didn’t know how to read it.
"I’m just..." Kaelis trails off briefly before exhaling quietly. "Surprised."
Ezra frowned slightly.
"Surprised?"
"I don’t quite actually know how to feel," Kaelis admits with an awkward laugh under his breath. "Or what to say now that you know the truth?"
That answer made Ezra stare at him for a second longer.
Because somehow—
Kaelis sounded honest.
Completely honest.
No performance.
Just confusion.
"Why?" Ezra asks quietly.
Kaelis lets out another soft breath.
"I don’t know either."
And somehow, Ezra believed that too.
The silence between them stretched for a moment after that.
Not uncomfortable exactly.
Just heavy.
Like both of them were trying to navigate something unfamiliar at the same time.
Then Ezra finally speaks again.
"Can you...answer why you never told me?" Ezra asks quietly, tilting his head slightly as he watches him carefully now.
Kaelis went silent again.
This time longer.
Long enough that Ezra thought maybe he was trying to come up with another excuse.
But then Kaelis suddenly laughs softly.
Not mockingly.
More tired than anything.
"Because you hated me," Kaelis says plainly.
Ezra immediately opens his mouth to deny it.
But nothing comes out.
Because honestly—
Could he even deny that?
Kaelis noticed his silence immediately and smiled faintly.
"See?" he says quietly. "That reaction right there."
Ezra looks away first this time.
And Kaelis’ smile weakens slightly.
"I guess I’ve grown used to us...not being on good terms," Kaelis continues more softly now, his fingers absentmindedly smoothing over the fabric on his sleeve. "You tolerate me, and that’s understandable, and maybe it might’ve changed if I had told you the truth, but we both know there was a higher chance you wouldn’t care, or you wouldn’t even have believed me."
Ezra’s brows furrowed immediately.
"I would have—"
"You wouldn’t have," Kaelis cuts in gently. "Maybe not intentionally. But you would’ve."
His gaze lowers slightly before he adds quieter—
"It would’ve disappointed you that it was me and not Helios."
And again—
Ezra couldn’t argue.
Because years ago...
He probably would have reacted exactly like that.
Back then, Helios could do no wrong in Ezra’s eyes.
And Kaelis—
Kaelis could barely do anything right.
The realization sat horribly in his chest.
"But the other day," Ezra asks after a moment, his voice quieter now, more confused than accusatory, "why not tell me the other day?"
Kaelis looks up slightly.
"When I asked who it was, you told me you didn’t know."
Kaelis immediately went silent.
Completely silent.
And for the first time since this conversation started, Ezra saw actual shame settle across his face.
Not embarrassment.
Not awkwardness.
Shame.
Kaelis looked down, his jaw tightening slightly like he regretted the answer before even saying it.
"I..."
He pauses briefly.
Then exhales quietly.
"I was scared."
Ezra’s eyes widened slightly.
"Scared?"
The word felt strange attached to Kaelis.
Kaelis laughs softly under his breath, but there is no humor in it.
"Yes, Captain. Scared."
"Scared...of what?"